10 Points of My "Judge Me By My Coffee Preference" Moment: Espresso


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There are many articles about what your favorite coffee says about you. Since I'm an egocentric a.k.a selfish Purwakartan man, I'm only curious about mine, mine, mine. So, I read several articles about it and tried to extract some points about how my favorite kind of coffee, Espresso, described me traits.

One thing before we get into the beef.. Everytime people ask me why do I like Espresso my answer is always the same; I like Espresso because, to me, its taste has the closest sense with my bitterly enjoyable average penis life. Trust me, I had measured it out well enough.

So, I don't drink Espresso just because. Watch out, world, a new philosopher is here.

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Here's what I found:



  1. According to ineedcoffee, Espresso drinker is a purist, straight-forward, sensible and moody person. It also says that I can be quite resistant to change and like to keep things simple. Espresso drinker is said to dislike goobledygooks. They got that right, I never like every word that comes out of my mouth or that I write.
  2.  
    via thedougdiaries












































































    See that? I'm bloody *admirable. 
  3. The famous TIME has revealed, based on research, that Espresso drinker takes on leadership, hard-working (but moody), knows how to get what they want.
  4. Irish Coffee Council (ICC) research finds that only 10% out of 1.000 respondents prefer Espresso. It also finds that Espresso drinkers tend to be disorganised (yup, guilty as charged) and spontaneous. They enjoy their own company and enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings (Jesus!). They are introverted but they have no difficulty speaking with others, they just prefer their own company. The findings might have scientifically explained why I'm still single.
  5. Huffington Post says that an Espresso drinker is a hardworking leader and always on the go. As a true lazy-ass man, I dispute the "hardworking leader" claim really. You can read the full article in Japanese here!
  6. According to Nicole German's research, an Espresso drinker does not tolerate insufficiencies or failures, punctual, in control, and sticks to a strict schedule. This makes them reliable and loyal. They know themselves well. Hahaha.. Bollocks.
  7. Body language specialists cum co-authors of The You Code, Judi James and James Moore, explains that Espresso drinker is someone with a lot of experiences, charismatic, energetic, smooth talker, and the life of the party. The experts believe that Espresso drinker knows how to get what they want but moodiness is the biggest vice.
  8. Telegraph says that Espresso is the choice of the intellectual sophisticate. 
  9. The Sydney Morning Herald says that if you want to pretend to be a sophisticated Italian, drink a cup of Espresso.
  10. The Little Things says that an Espresso drinker is a natural born leader, hardworker, knowing how to get things done, inspiring at work and in social life. An espresso drinker like things a little more straightforward.  
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I'd believe that some of the abovementioned findings can be argued scientifically and some others are utterly subjective and dubiously accurate. I'd also say that a hardworking-experienced-charismatic-inspiring-person is far-fetched in describing who I really am presently. However, I feel the connections with some points like enjoying solitary moments and being moody. 

This is a fun thing to do, though, and I highly recommend this sort of self-assessment activity to you, fellow coffee drinkers. Let me know the result! :)

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